Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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