??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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