Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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