And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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