Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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