I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
