That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize