I hate your face
they need to just BURY HIM!
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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