I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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