you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
