I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
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