Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
