We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
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She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
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New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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