I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
