well you can't waste a boner
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
