But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
