it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
