are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I think weed is turning my hair brown
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
