So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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