careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
