I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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