I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
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