Your mouth is God's brothel.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize