Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
