Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize