The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
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