Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
