paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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