ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize