I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
