Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
