I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize