Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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