Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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