i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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