you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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