can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize