mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
