Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize