I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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