In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
