If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize