Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
and you fell through a lawn chair
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize