I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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