I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
