Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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