I hate all girls vehemently.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
