Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
