I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
