ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize